Soon To Be Classics

Monday, April 30, 2007

Marketing 101

This was forwarded to me by a comrade at work today. It is a very succinct description of your Marketing 101 class.

1. You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to
him and say, 'I'm fantastic in bed.'

That's Direct Marketing.

2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy.
One of your friends goes up to him and, pointing at you, says, 'She's
fantastic in bed.'

That's Advertising.

3. You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his
telephone number. The next day you call and say, 'Hi, I'm fantastic in

That's Telemarketing.

4. You see a guy at a party; you straighten your dress. You walk up to
him and pour him a drink. You say, 'May I?' and reach up to straighten
his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say,
'By the way, I'm fantastic in bed.'

That's Public Relations.

5. You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and
says, 'I hear you're fantastic in bed.'

That's Brand Recognition.

6. You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you
talk him into going home with your friend.

That's a Sales Rep.

7. Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.

That's Tech Support.

8. You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be
handsome men in all these houses you're passing, so you climb onto the
roof of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your
lungs, 'I'm fantastic in bed!'

That's Junk Mail.

9. You are at a party; this well-built man walks up to you and grabs
your ass.

That's the Governor of California.

10. You like it, but twenty years later your attorney decides you were

That's America.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Shapeshifting 101

I have a topic for the gang to discuss.


Personally, I'm growing very weary of the plot mechanic on TV. It was for me, what ruined Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, made Battlestar Galactica boring until they revealed all of the seven, and now they've brought one into Heroes. The big reason you see them on TV (and curiously, not so much in movies) is that it is a cheap way to produce a show. You still pay your same actors (Heroes and DS9), you don't require expensive special effects for your aliens (DS9 and BSG) and it helps placate said actors by given them different and often uncharacteristic things to do.

I find it especially troubling on Heroes now that you can no longer trust a single thing you see on screen. Any shocking action any character takes can always be explained away as the shapeshifter. The scene with Claire was very clumsy. I'm not even sure why it was there. Did anyone, even for a second believe that was really Claire? How could HRG trust anyone until he physically sees the shapeshifter perish?

Personally, I dislike the whole plot device. It just allows the story to become lazy. Does this bother anyone else but me?

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Kryptonite Discovered On Earth

Scientists have found Kryptonite on Earth. Check it out here.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

And Part 2

Since you guys enjoyed the first one...

Sunday, April 15, 2007

What Hath God Wrought

For those of you who aren't buffs of the history of communication, the first telegraph communication tapped out was "What Hath God Wrought?". Although it was Samuel Morse who tapped it out, we can thank young Annie Ellworth for suggesting the Biblical verse from Numbers 23:23. Why that particular passage for the start of an industry that would change mankind more than anything else is unknown. But I find it interesting that it's a somewhat sobering question in light of an exciting achievement.

Further, and quite literally, a friend of mind and I were discussing the why of that statement just yesterday. Then this morning, I read this. For those of you who don't want to click away, it's a story about a possible cause for the decline of bee colonies by as much as 70 percent and the threat this poses to world food supply. Cell phones, it posits, could be partially or wholly responsible for the sudden losses.

What hath God wrought, indeed?

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

I Am...

It is simply amazing what you can build when you're locked in a shack being guarded by surely North Korean Nationalists.

Ok, that was a little vague. But you got the message.

I think.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

It Just Bears Repeating

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Is Online Civility Impossible?

There's an interesting article here about a movement to try and come up with a code of conduct for online posting.

Now, I have a pretty good idea how a few of you might react (looking at you here, Shocho) to this but I think it's worthy of discussion. Let me explain.

I, and many of my fellow bloggers, work in industries where we make products that are passion-based, young male targeted. To that end, we are DAILY subject to some of the most hateful vitriol that you can possibly believe. Our companies run forums that allow our consumers to congregate and participate in a "community" which oftentimes is just a soapbox for these guys' frustrations for whatever else in life ails them.

What is funny, is that when you meet these individuals face to face, they would never in a million years say the same things. In fact, these guys generally go out of their way to be nice and polite. I've often heard, "yeah, sorry about the forums. It's just a 'Net thing, you know?"

Well no, I guess I don't know. Personally, I was raised that civility, politeness and manners shouldn't depend upon the medium or the velocity of the message delivery. I can remember only a few times that I "lost it" on someone and immediately apologized. (Hence my adoption of the "type it, walk away, read again before sending" rule.)

I do remember one of the first times someone savaged me online. It was in an AOL chat room where we were discussing Star Trek novels. I stated I didn't like Trek novels that constantly referenced the series and pointed out a recent novel that did. Little did I know, the writer was in the chat room, and responded to me so hatefully and rudely that to this day I avoid him and his works.

There is a certain empowerment in the anonymous nature of the 'Net. Some people are severely limited in social situations. Unfortunately, they seem to be the ones that explode when they get in front of a keyboard. I wonder, do they feel better about themselves after a night of poisoned typing? Do any of them ever sit back and realize "wow, maybe I went a little overboard"? Somehow, I doubt it. The ease of email and forums allows us to type from our reptilian brain which is more concerned with rending and tearing.

So, let's say that a blogging (and extension to forum and email) code of conduct is adopted. Would anyone use it? Would it make us better people?


Saturday, April 07, 2007

Spicy Hot

This is Ashley. She's trying to sell me a spicy chicken sandwich. Honestly. That's it.

From a marketing standpoint, it's a pretty cool plan. From a guy's point of view..well, you know.

Check it out here and wander around the website. It's kind of fun.