Quenching the Thirst
It's hot here in Seattle today. I'm mean, dog-wiping-ass-on-carpet hot. Not that I mind too much. There are indeed mushrooms growing in my brain from my last two years in the Seattle sewer (lest you think I'm actually living IN a sewer, that word is pretty much how I describe this city) and the heat of my last two weekends and now today just help burn them out for a time.
Anyway, the high today was like 100 degrees. To hear the newscasters describe it, would sound like this:
"...and now we check the weather with KOMO 4's Steve Pool..."
"HOLY SHIT!! THE GOD-DAMNED SUN JUST LANDED ON THE F'ING SPACE NEEDLE!!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!! IT'S THE HOTTEST DAY IN THE HISTORY OF EVER!!!"
And I'm not making this, a reporter on the radio this afternoon actually said, "...that diet soda could be deadly to you today...".
Unfreaking-believable. Bunch of coffee-swilling weenies.
It reminds me a lot of when Deb and I were on-air and 2 flakes of snow were forecast. The local media went into "white death" mode with a bunch of "FIRST ALERT WEATHER SHIT" every five minutes. Great stuff.
But the reason for this post is how I'm beating the heat. It dawned on me as I sat in my 89 degree house (sans AC) at 11pm, that I was thirsty. Ah, what to quench my thirst?
I drank two glasses of Gatorade (Lime) and let that sit. Nope. Not quite.
Then I drank some water like a good, healthy American. No effect.
So I decided to risk death and try the diet soda. No death but still not quenched.
I just polished off a glass of chocolate milk.
I think I'm gonna barf. If I do, I'll take pics and post.
What's worse, is I see a bottle of lemon juice next to the sink and my brain is working on something it won't let the rest of me in on.
I'll keep you updated unless the diet soda does me in.
Anyway, the high today was like 100 degrees. To hear the newscasters describe it, would sound like this:
"...and now we check the weather with KOMO 4's Steve Pool..."
"HOLY SHIT!! THE GOD-DAMNED SUN JUST LANDED ON THE F'ING SPACE NEEDLE!!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!! IT'S THE HOTTEST DAY IN THE HISTORY OF EVER!!!"
And I'm not making this, a reporter on the radio this afternoon actually said, "...that diet soda could be deadly to you today...".
Unfreaking-believable. Bunch of coffee-swilling weenies.
It reminds me a lot of when Deb and I were on-air and 2 flakes of snow were forecast. The local media went into "white death" mode with a bunch of "FIRST ALERT WEATHER SHIT" every five minutes. Great stuff.
But the reason for this post is how I'm beating the heat. It dawned on me as I sat in my 89 degree house (sans AC) at 11pm, that I was thirsty. Ah, what to quench my thirst?
I drank two glasses of Gatorade (Lime) and let that sit. Nope. Not quite.
Then I drank some water like a good, healthy American. No effect.
So I decided to risk death and try the diet soda. No death but still not quenched.
I just polished off a glass of chocolate milk.
I think I'm gonna barf. If I do, I'll take pics and post.
What's worse, is I see a bottle of lemon juice next to the sink and my brain is working on something it won't let the rest of me in on.
I'll keep you updated unless the diet soda does me in.
Labels: Barfing, Chocolate Milk, Heat
posted by Mkae at
10:50 PM
1 Comments:
When I was out there and we'd go out to lunch and the sun was out, the locals acted like vampires, recoiling and pulling their cloaks over their heads.
By
Shocho, at 6:35 AM
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