The Next Chapter
We got the diagnosis for mom yesterday. The neurologist confirmed she has Alzheimer's Disease. Based on the tissue lost revealed in the Petscan, she's had it for maybe 2 years. She hadn't really been responsive to much during these visits and tests. I always tried to make sure she understood what was going on and why we were there without pushing her. She never really reacted to much of anything. Until yesterday. She almost broke down crying in the doctor's office. To make matters worse, I had always told mom that we were doing this to make her feel better. I asked the doctor if today was a baseline, would she ever feel better once we started her on the medication. His reply was "no, it will only slow the disease." I feel like I lied to her all these months by giving her false hope.
I think she truly believes she's going to die and that she'll spend the rest of her days in confused pain. She might be right. I really don't know.
Now, we have to figure out what to do next. She's started the meds so we'll see what the side effects are. I suppose I need to call the Alzheimer's Association to get help. I hate asking anyone for help. But I really just don't know what to expect. I've read some stuff online but honestly, after a while it begins to read like worthless platitudes. Mom seems to have aged about 20 years in the last 12 months.
What's really funny is how my sister reacted when I told her we were getting tests for Alzheimer's. She seemed more concerned that my dad had Parkinson's Disease and mom might have Alzheimer's. "With both parents having neurological disorders, that means there's a better chance we might get that, you know." What a way to put yourself first. I guess a crisis shows your true character.
Sooner or later there's going to be a point where she doesn't recognize her grandchildren. The kids don't know anything is wrong. For some reason, Bailey made the strangest comment last night. Out of the blue, she said "...there's no last winter with Grandma, is there daddy?" I had no idea how to reply. Maybe she's smarter than her stupid old man thinks she is.
So there's the update. I'll write more as I know it.
I think she truly believes she's going to die and that she'll spend the rest of her days in confused pain. She might be right. I really don't know.
Now, we have to figure out what to do next. She's started the meds so we'll see what the side effects are. I suppose I need to call the Alzheimer's Association to get help. I hate asking anyone for help. But I really just don't know what to expect. I've read some stuff online but honestly, after a while it begins to read like worthless platitudes. Mom seems to have aged about 20 years in the last 12 months.
What's really funny is how my sister reacted when I told her we were getting tests for Alzheimer's. She seemed more concerned that my dad had Parkinson's Disease and mom might have Alzheimer's. "With both parents having neurological disorders, that means there's a better chance we might get that, you know." What a way to put yourself first. I guess a crisis shows your true character.
Sooner or later there's going to be a point where she doesn't recognize her grandchildren. The kids don't know anything is wrong. For some reason, Bailey made the strangest comment last night. Out of the blue, she said "...there's no last winter with Grandma, is there daddy?" I had no idea how to reply. Maybe she's smarter than her stupid old man thinks she is.
So there's the update. I'll write more as I know it.
posted by Mkae at
10:44 PM
3 Comments:
I know this wasn't unexpected, but I'm sorry your prognosis isn't better.
(((hug))) There are more of those if you need them. Do call the Alzheimer's Associaion. If nothing else, there is comfort in being able to connect with other people in the same boat as you. You don't feel so alone.
People react in different ways to stress and heartache. Try not to hold this against your sister. Hopefully, she'll step up and be there for both of you.
As for Bailey: Children are amazing and perceptive creatures. They understand so much more than you think they do, and they can help you understand compassion in ways you never expected. I wish we all could be more like them sometimes.
Oh, and (((hug))), 'cuz I know you need another one.
By
Beanie, at 6:09 AM
Agreed absolutely, contact the Association. And our thoughts are with you and yours.
By
Shocho, at 6:44 AM
Wow, sorry to hear about your Mom. This is a suject that comes up a lot now at family gatherings nowadays. I know my parents wonder how we will respond once they lose their mobility.
Thanks for sharing your story.
By
Roycer, at 4:45 PM
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